Onward, Christian Soldier

Jack: 'Momma, I couldn't sit "Criss-cross Applesauce" (the P.C. way to say Indian Style) in the circle for Bible Story today."

Me: "Why not?"

J: "I couldn't sit that way because my pee-pee was standing up."

M: "Oh... uh... what did you do?"

J: "I just told the Sunday School teacher that I couldn't sit down because my pee-pee was standing up."

M: "Great. What did he say?"

J: "He just told me not to touch it and it would go away."

M: "Perfect."

Change is gonna come...

Until I posted the Kindergarten count-down, I hadn't realized how much we have to change in such a short amount of time. They say it takes 30 days to learn a new habit. Well, that's about how long we've got.

Jack needs to adjust to the following life changes... and FAST:

1) Brush his own teeth in the morning. (Yes, we are a little neurotic about his pearly whites.)

2) Wipe his own hiny. (Gross, but I already confirmed that the teacher won't do this for him.)

3) Go to bed early.

4) Get woken up early.

5) Function with a super short nap every day.

6) Go through a school day without access to his own box of baby wipes. (He currently wipes his hands between strokes of chalk or fingerpaint, wipes his own feet after going outside barefoot, wipes out his Crocs if they get sandy or dusty on a playground, wipes his face and neck if he gets the least bit sweaty, and wipes the table surface before starting new artwork.)

Today we managed to get him to bed at 9:00pm. Believe it or not, that's a little earlier than normal, but it's a start. He has already come out of his room several times to tell us how "not tired" he is, so he's still going to be super sleepy in the morning when I get him up.

One day at a time... and only 28 more to go.

Sometimes you just have to rescue yourself.

No thanks, Jon Wayne. I tried, but you guys treated me like a hot wife instead of a smart cookie. In lieu of blogging the past five days, I have spent a few hours googling different brands of air conditioners (heat pumps to be more exact) while sitting in my own personal 1500 sq-ft sauna.

Between escalated phone calls and third opinions, I have been traipsing my kids all over town to mooch off the coolness of family and friends. Thanks to all who housed us, cooled us, fed us, babysat for us, and brought over SONIC drinks and portable fans while I navigated the HVAC run-around. Oh, and Melody, thanks for helping chase my dog to the next street when the A/C guys accidentally let her loose today. I was so glad to take an unplanned jog at noon in the Texas heat as if I was not hot enough already.

If you don't know the difference between an R-22 unit and a Puron 410 unit... don't understand SEER ratings... don't know about EPA regulations that are changing at the end of 2009... or are unaware of another one of Santa Clause's free gifts, er, I mean, Obama's government rebate...

... just ask this Hot Wife.

Shrinkosaurus Rex

Jack and I ordered an awesome "Gigantosaurus" pinata on-line for his T-Rex party and were so excited about getting it in the mail! I had it delivered to Mom's house because I wanted the huge box to be a surprise the next time we visited. Plus, she has more ROOM to store it for five weeks!

Well, when Mom finally got it in the mail, she didn't seem especially enthusiastic about the size of the box. When I arrived, I couldn't believe how tiny it was. As we opened it, I was hoping it required assembly and would be much bigger than it appeared.

Jack saw it and said... (as I crossed my fingers and held my breath a little... ) "I thought it would be bigger, but it's still really cool, right?" PHEW! Awesome - he still appreciates it. Now, what to do with all the candy I purchased to fill it... I could have filled three of them, lemme tell ya. I pre-stuffed the treat bags with the extra candy, so everyone would leave with plenty of loot whether they get in on the pinata action or not.

Here is a picture to give a little perpective... Davis with, (air quotes) "Gigantosaurus."

Oh well, now that I think about it... it WAS only $12.95.

As you can see, we went ahead and brought it home. Turns out we have room to store it after all.

Defensive Driving... notable quotes...

Actual lines from my on-line TX Defensive Driving course:

"Elderly children are among the most vulnerable pedestrians, so be careful in areas around schools, retirement communities, and recreation areas." (Those elderly children are the worst.)

"Don't let your anatomical gifts go to waste." (referring to the Texas Organ and Tissue Donor program.)

"Good drivers should adjust their speed according to their physical condition." (If I had known it meant I'd be allowed to DRIVE faster, I might have been better about using my treadmill.)

"Many collisions can be avoided before they even happen." (This sentence brought to you by the Department of Redundancy Department.)

"The eyes of experienced driver sweep sweep into curve serveral seconds before reaching it." (What?!? - and yes, that is how it was spelled.)

"Make sure the child seat harness is taut (not tight) over the child’s shoulders." (Interesting. I don't think I was ever taut the difference between the two.)

"Don't let your drinking do your thinking." (I actually liked that one.)

Doctor, Doctor...

11:04 am - I am on my way to the pediatrician with one hoarse, coughing sick 4-yr-old and one perfectly happy healthy one-year-old. The sad thing is, the 4-yr old will leave happy with stickers and a lollipop, while the one-year-old will get four shots and leave feeling like crap.

1:13 pm - Jack has croupe. Doc prescribed a steroid, sleeping at an incline, and cold air. Davis is a healthy 19-pound, 6-ounce one-year-old who wants to suck on the doctor's stethoscope, pull off his glasses, and grab his beard. He got three shots (can't get the others because of the egg allergy), which caused both of my boys to cry. Jack's heart hurts when Davis is upset, and I think that is the sweetest thing.

Let's hope these two boys will take a good nap for me. Since I skipped the actual class TWO Mondays in a row, I now have an on-line Defensive Driving class to take. *sigh*

Soundtrack of a Birth.

Exactly twelve months ago today... at 12:00 pm, I walked into the operating room for my scheduled c-section because Baby Boy Griffin (name had not yet been "released") was in the breech position. I prayed even on the way to St. Luke's Baptist that we'd arrive and be told that he'd have flipped, but unfortunately he was performing his first of many acts of stubbornness.

When I entered the OR and saw the operating table, I just broke down crying, "This is so unnatural! This is not how it was supposed to be!" I buried my face in my hands and leaned my head onto the shoulder of... the Hispanic male nurse who was probably hearing the Southwest Airlines ad in his head "Wanna getaway?"... He would be my comfort for the next 30 minutes while I was prepped, numbed and strapped to the table. I just remember my glasses fogging up because I could not stop crying, reminiscing about Jack's picture perfect delivery... the way nature intended.

My angel of a nurse assured me that in a few minutes Jeff could re-join me and we'd get the show on the road. Jeff came in at the same time my doctor did and both were in full medical gear. Seeing them started the waterworks all over again. These were the same two men who were there for my very first surgery, after which I left the hospital without a baby in my arms. The hormones were in full gear and this pretty much put me over the edge.

They turned on the radio in the Operating Room as the surgery was scheduled for 12:30 and it was about to be go-time. The staff took their places and the song began, "We are the Champions, my friend..." Wait a minute. I timidly asked the nurse, "Can we change the radio station because I never imagined QUEEN on the soundtrack of my child's entry into this world."

As she tuned in K-LOVE, the surgery began. At 1:01pm on July 14th, 2008, this little blue-eyed, 6-pound, 11-ounce miracle entered our world...

...and God was playing the perfect song:

"In the secret,

In the quiet place.

In the stillness

You are there.

In the secret,

in the quiet hour I wait,

Only for You,

'cause I want to know You more;

I want to know You,

I want to hear Your voice

I want to know You more.

I want to touch You,

I want to see Your face,

I want to know You more.

I am reaching for the highest goal,

then I might receive the prize.

Pressing onward,

pushing every hindrance aside,

Out of my way,

'cause I want to know you more.

I want to know You,

I want to hear Your voice,

I want to know You more.

I want to touch You,

I want to see Your face,

I want to know You more.

In the secret, in the quiet place

In the stillness, You are there."

It was a bumpy road getting him home, but our home has truly felt complete ever since.

Happy 1st Birthday, Davis Jarrell!

"Ladies and Gentlemen, we have a weaner!"

As Davis' first birthday approaches, so does the end of the crazy whirlwind adventure that is breastfeeding. I had NO idea one year ago that I would go the distance with the nursing thing. I mean, I wanted to do the best I could, but had the bottles and formula ready just in case. When I was finally ready to quit, he wouldn't let me.

Fast forward to today... Davis is drinking a 20% formula/80% cow's milk mixture for all but his night-time feeding (and the occasional lazy afternoon feeding) and taking it all from a big-boy cup! We have come a long way. The weaning schedule has upset the sleep schedule quite a bit (necessitating a middle of the night wake-up the past three nights) but we are patiently working through it. I hate the sudden interruption, but love the snuggling, rocking, and singing. Teething has made the process even more... special.

It seems that he's one step closer to being a big boy. He no longer needs his Mommy for nourishment or comfort in this way and that's sad. He turns one on Tuesday and I plan on making Tuesday night the very last night I nurse him. [Oh my goodness. I started crying when I just typed that.]

I can say three things for sure:

1) We came a long way, baby!

2) I am glad to have my body back.

3) I am sure going to miss it.

It's been hard and tiring, and sweet and amazing, painful and suffocating, and bonding and wonderful, hot and embarrassing... it just depends on what day you asked me. It has been a huge lesson in patience, selflessness, and giving up control, and for that, I am a better woman for having persevered.

Lacey Nicole is COLLEGE-BOUND!

It's so hard to believe that my niece Lacey was Jack's age when I first met her. This May, she graduated from High School!

Just so I am not the only one who feels old, I wish to quickly point out that she was born in 1991!

The festivities began when we hosted a "Fiesta de Lacey" at our house to celebrate her 18th birthday. Jack painstakingly decorated her brownie cake and it is fair to say he was pretty proud of the end result. He reminded me that he is allergic to EATING brownies, but is definitely NOT allergic to DECORATING them.

The sparkler candles were a hit, but it took Lacey, Jack, and eventually even Hope to finally blow them out.

Hope with Nana after we enjoyed about 10,000 calories of nachos and ice cream sundaes. Jack giving Lacey her hand-wrapped gift. We rounded out the evening with a good old-fashioned game of "keep the balloon from hitting the ground." A game that, as Jack claims, he made up.

The following weekend, we went to the Gracepoint Church Graduation banquet to celebrate the seniors in the youth group and Jack felt honored that he was allowed to go. His behavior was AWESOME througout the ceremony. We were so proud. Here he is praying with the graduate.

Left: The proud parents, Melody and Van. Right: Lacey with Andy, the "other Dad" to many of the youth. He was a loving, effective youth pastor and will now continue to inspire them as the college minister at Gracepoint. He gave an inspiring speech at the banquet and any time he referred to his son Brady, one of Lacey's best friends and fellow grads, there were many people reaching for the tissues.

The Gracepoint seniors wearing their gowns from their different high schools. I hope these friendships last as long as my youth group friendships have. I think they know these are very memorable times they've shared together, but I have a feeling they won't realize just HOW unique and special it was for several years. There really is nothing in adult life that can compare to what you experience in a close-knit church youth group.



Jack Everett, armed with some Playaway Books, was ready for the ceremony to begin! Aunt Mel just introduced us to these and I cannot believe I had never heard of them. They are awesome, portable, and you can check them out at the library.



Lucky for us, Health Careers High School has a relatively small graduating class, and Lacey was easy to spot with her blonde hair and shiny yellow shoes. We yelled, "Go Lacey!" when they called her name and announced she'd be attending Nursing School at Angelo State University.

Looking out over the group of graduates, I found myself fantasizing about yelling out to them, "DON'T GET A CREDIT CARD!... AVOID STUDENT LOANS AT ALL COSTS!... DON'T EVER TAKE A SEMESTER OFF!... DON'T FORGET TO THANK YOUR PARENTS!... FIND A CHURCH IN YOUR NEW TOWN RIGHT AWAY!... FOLLOW YOUR BLISS, NOT WHAT PAYS A LOT!... DON'T GO TO PARTIES WHERE THERE MIGHT BE DRUGS!..." Instead, I just calmly cheered for Lacey when they called her name.



Lacey with her proud Auntie M and her very proud twin, uh, I mean, Mom. I know Lacey will make good choices and be a light on her college campus. I just wish I could go with her to watch over her. I wish I could protect her from all that I know is out there waiting for her. I can't imagine how her parents must feel.



Little Sister Hope will follow Lacey's footsteps at Health Careers High School this coming year. Left: Hope, Lacey, Nana and Jack. Right: Lacey and some of her very best friends, Jackie, Ashley, and Brady



We then headed for a very memorable dinner at the Rainforest Cafe downtown... at 9:30pm. Yes, with Jack Everett in tow. He was so excited because he LOVED the Rainforest Cafe in Houston just a couple of weeks earlier. Well, as soon as the creepy Crocodile scared him and a huge python almost came down and hissed on his head, he was PETRIFIED. I have never seen him like this. After a one-hour stand-off in the hallway, I had finally decided we were going to have to leave. He was crying off and on, clinging onto me, and would not even look around the corner because of the "mean gorillas." He was hunkered down in a fire exit corridor and would not budge. The hostess even came over and gave him a toy crocodile to hold and assured him that she had turned off all the animals just for him so he could walk to the table. He gladly took "Nile, the Crocodile" but pleaded for me to just take him home.

I finally sent Andy (the aforementioned "other Dad" who happens to have four boys of his own) to talk to Jack. Before we knew it, here came Andy from some secret hallway... carrying JACK! We all clapped! Andy had apparently talked to the restaurant manager who took them out of the building, around the back, and through the KITCHEN of the restaurant... apparently an animal-free path! So, the rest of the evening was awesome! Yea, Andy!!!

Finally, Lacey could open her personalized gift (a DVD player for her dorm) from us. The wrapping paper read, "Way to go, Lacey! We will miss you!" If you click on it, you can see that there is a red house on it with three yellow people in it. Jack explained to the whole table, "It's ME, DADDY, and DAVIS!" Of course, they ask, "Where's your MOMMY?" to which he replied, "The house was not big enough for her." Thanks a lot.

Lacey designed a shirt to wear to her "John Deere" themed graduation party at the lake, and was so sweet to make matching shirts for the boys. On the front, Jack's says, "Felicidades 2009" which is Spanish for Congratulations! (Lacey is often teaching Jack new Spanish words.) Davis' says, "Class of 2026!" On the back, they read, "Big Cousin, and Lil' Cuz!"

They loved wearing their matching shirts to the lake party the next day.

Lacey, I am very proud of you and cannot wait to see what your future holds. I know two boys who will miss you very much... especially Jack Everett. You hold a very special place in his heart that has been there from the beginning. Don't worry, I am one phone call away if you need any Auntly advice (especially about staying out of debt and staying away from Bad Boys.) Good luck in this new adventure and enjoy every minute of college life. Just like High School, it will be over before you know it! I love you!

"Auntie M"

... where credit is due...

I overheard this conversation a few minutes ago while Jack was coloring with Nana at the kitchen table:

Nana: "Jack, you are a good artist. Do you know where you got your artistic ability?"

Jack: "From Daddy."

Nana: "That's right. And do you know what you got from your Mommy?"

Jack: "My pinata."

"Walkin'...yes, indeed, I'm walkin'..."

Of course, he's his Daddy's son... highly motivated to go after the remote.

Happy Birthday, blog.

It's crazy to think I have been writing on this thing for TWO YEARS! Sure beats watching television. And housework.

Jeff keeps reminding me that I need to figure out how to get paid for writing it... while not compromising my privacy or my kids' privacy. I am not sure if it's possible. I don't want to brand my kids for profit, but the profit part sure sounds nice. I think about it a lot, but always feel like it could get out of control or become a negative thing... plus I am self-conscious about whether anyone would find it interesting. So, last night I actually had a vivid dream about it.

I dreamt that I had the blog printed as a collection of essays and someone picked it up and thought it was awesome. They published it and... yadda yadda yadda... I was soon scheduled to appear on Oprah. [Hey, it was MY dream.] I even dreamed that I needed to call Anna for a hair appointment to cover my gray. [It IS shot in HD.] Anyway, a week before I was to go on the show, there was a horrible article printed in the tabloids about me spanking my kids and I suddenly became known nation-wide as a terrible mother. Exerpts of my blog were taken out of context and being used against me. I then saw my picture there with me holding the Spanking Spoon in the air. It was all taken out of context when I was really just baking a dessert for my husband's birthday. I was so mad at myself. Why had I allowed greed and pride to take over my private hobby and creative outlet? I can't turn back now!

And then I woke up. Phew, that was crazy. [Crazy narcissistic.]

Anyway, with that, the dream is put on hold again. In the meantime I continue to record the day-to-day silliness, stress, and much laughter that make up a day in the life of this lucky Mom. I am still amazed that anyone outside of my immediate family reads along. Apparently others can relate to it on some level, and that's just icing on the cake.

I hope my kids appreciate this record of my life... of their lives. I hope they realize what these fleeting times mean to me and how I cherish every word of every chapter of the sweet sweet story that is their childhood.

To be continued...