"Be happy with what you have..."

I have been trying to teach Jack this lesson his whole life, but have kicked it into high gear recently. I think it has become more urgent during this recession as I watch grown adults becoming depressed and feeling worthless because they can no longer afford their "things." It makes me so sad watching teenagers throw complete temper tantrums when asked to give up their THINGS, sometimes for just one week. (Yes, on Oprah.)

I want him to realize how much he has, and I pray that he will realize that things are just things... and will never ever make him happy. Consume, consume, consume... kids today are obsessed with and impressed by all things NEW. It doesn't matter if it costs $.99 cents; if it's NEW, that makes it AWESOME. At least that is how it had gotten with Jack. Heck, I know adults who feel this way. If Jack has a Hot Wheel for two weeks, it's no longer NEW. It goes in the pile with the others until he gets excited when someone brings him another NEW one, which subsequently becomes the favorite. At least for a few days.

I feel like teaching this lesson in today's society is like holding my finger in a hole in the dam and am often overwhelmed by the pressure of the water trying to break through. Jeff and I have finally put our foot down (feet down?) with our amazingly well-intended, generous, loving, but regularly over-indulging family... NO TOYS FOR MY KIDS. NONE. It's not his birthday. He should not get something new just for being cute - not even for behaving well in a store. It HAS to stop. We have to stand up for his heart and his character while he's still so impressionable.

Trust me, people in the family are now afraid to buy him things, and Jeff and I like it this way. :)

We want Jack to feel love and joy in other ways... with time, attention, activity... not by being given material things. When we take such delight in his delight in THINGS, how can we expect to teach him that he will ONLY find happiness through giving to others and serving God?

Anyway... wow, that was quite the tangent... I digress.

This morning he came to me, not whining at all, just very matter-of-factly and said, "Momma, I know I have a lot of toys, and I know there are lots of kids that don't have any toys, but it's just that MY toys aren't really fun anymore." I could tell that he was trying to calmly reconcile his feelings with what we have been teaching him about his possessions. I was proud of him for replacing the usual, "My toys are not as fun as Logan's toys..." or "I'm Booooooooooorrrrrred..." with this attempt at using his words to express his disappointment.

So I told him, "Jack, I know how you feel. Sometimes I feel a little bored with my same old things." He immediately says, "Like your green Honda?" I smiled, "EXACTLY!" {I regularly tell him how I feel temptation to buy a beautiful new Honda Pilot... about how hard Daddy works... about being good stewards of our money... that our car is running just fine... even telling him that my friends still like me even though my car rattles really loudly... so basically, it didn't surprise me one bit that his thoughts went immediately to my rusty-but-trusty '99 CR-V.}

"Honey, one of the best ways to make your toys exciting again is to mix them together with other toys in a brand new way. For example, try to create something with your legos and Play-doh together... or your jets and dinosaurs together."

To which he replies, "But jets and dinosaurs are not from the same million days."

After explaining (I find I spend a lot of time explaining things like this to him at this age.) "I know Jack, the dinos were millions of years before jets, but this is just pretend. You can make ANYTHING go together! You might surprise yourself." He went off into his room to play alone.

He came out after about twenty minutes and was in his pajamas, almost ready for nap. He was still sort of sulky and disappointed. He was playing with his wooden IKEA car building set and couldn't re-create the car from the picture on the instruction manual. He was sad that "Mommies aren't good with building cars but Daddies are always at work when kids want to build cars." He sat at the kitchen table, again noticeably intentional not to whine or be disrespectful.

I prompted him again to try and create something with his new contraption (the wooden truck that he didn't like) and see what he could come up with.... then proceeded to chat with my Mom on the phone.

After about 15 minutes or so, I ended my call when I saw THIS creation on the kitchen table:



I got the camera and asked him to describe what he had made. (At first he did not realize I was filming him.)



Ugh - Did you see that dramatic EYE ROLL at the END of the first clip??? I didn't even notice it until I watched the tape back!!! That rascal!

My favorite part is when he says, "...my same old toys are great!!" That is music to this Mother's ears.

I think I am going to head outside and vacuum out ol' rusty-but-trusty. I joke about it, but I truly am content with the car I have. Besides, it would have been harder for me to teach this lesson from the front seat of a brand new Pilot.