E-mail reply from Danny, thoughts of 9/11

Danny e-mailed me shortly after reading my thoughts on our experience handling World Trade Center claims after September 11th. He did not know I was going to post his e-mail to the blog, but I wanted to record his emotion and perspective as we continue to pay our respects this week.

"Melissa,

To this day I watch specials on 9/11 and I remember those long days with pride and a heavy heart. Do you realize how many people affected by 9/11 we spoke to? How many other people in this world can say that? My wife to this day cannot understand how/why I am so connected with this tragedy. In that sense you and I will forever be linked. Only you, Ed, Christine, Betty, Melissa M. and Richard can possibly know what it was like. Every call was from someone who lost a family member or who lost 50 of their co-workers. We were therapists more than claims adjusters.

I still remember when you insisted on looking up the photo of our member's son. As soon as you saw the picture you burst into tears. Every time a call ended, someone was in tears. Call after call, day after day. It truly was one of the hardest things I have ever done.

The next 2 years I could not work on 9/11. Too many emotions. But if I had to do it again, knowing what I know now................ I wouldn't hesitate. Count me in. That experience changed me forever; and for the better too. I recall calling a member one Sunday evening. He was an elderly gentleman who was claiming some personal effects of his son. After I processed his payment, he asked me why I was working on a Sunday evening. I told him that USAA was working from 7 to 7 every day so we could assist all of our members who had been affected by this tragedy. This man who lost his son then expressed how sorry he was that I had to endure such a grueling schedule to help him!!!! I was floored. I told him, "Sir, you have experienced a far worse tragedy. What I am doing is nothing. It's the least I can do for you". He was so grateful. I will never forget him.

I try to take positives from it as well. Plan for the future but live life every day. Tell your family you love them every day. Stop and enjoy the simple things. Be cautious but not afraid of terrorism. It's hard to balance. My wife finds it odd because her nickname for me is "the rock". I handle crisis well. But I am always somber on and around 9/11. I watched the movie WTC and United 93 and if a special comes on TV I record it and watch it. It's my way of honoring the survivors and those left behind. I feel it's important to know the story, to remember what happened, to never forget and to learn from it.

I talked to these people. You remember. These weren't claims calls. These people told us about their lives. They shared their grief. We were part of their family after that. It seems like I was there standing with them. They were attacked and so was I. Every year it comes flooding back. It never gets easier. But I would not change anything. I was honored to be part of it. It was a small contribution but I think we helped many people move on.

In the middle of all that I received a blessing. On 9/18/01 I found out I was going to be a Dad. How ironic it was to learn of this at a time when I was dealing with so much sorrow. As each year passes I always pause and reflect on the events of that day. The chaos, the fear. The destruction and death. I walked into the USAA break room just as the second tower fell. The room was packed and you could have heard a pin drop. Watching that was was the worst thing I have ever seen and is forever burned into my memory. I will never forget."

Thanks Danny for allowing me to share.